A church personnel committee asked their pastor to evaluate his ministry in comparison to the ministry of Jesus. Here is his humble response:
**JESUS **PASTOR
Walks on water.........................Slips on ice
Changes water into wine...........Changes water into coffee
Welcomes children.................Has children's sermon
Curses fig tree...................Kills houseplants
Stills the storm..................Puts storm windows on sills
Feeds 5,000.......................Buys snacks for youth program
Heals centurion's servant at a distance...Can use the TV remote control
Heals paralyzed man...............Gets children to do chores
Overturns money-changer tables....Puts away folding tables
Raises the dead...................Wakes teenagers
Casts out demons..................Turns on night-light
Cleanses lepers...................Has changed dirtydiapers
Light of the World................Turner of light switches
Stands at door and knocks.........Has church key
Calls disciples...................E-mails deacons and elders
By: J. Christy Ramsey
Published in ECULAUGH a humor meeting on www,Ecunet.org in February of 1997.
It was also published in "Holy Hillarity" by Cal Samra and the "Joyful Noiseletter."