My Corner Online


I feel like I'm in a pinball machine!


Sony advertised its Bravia LCD TV utilizing 250,000 multi-colored bouncing balls at Filbert and Leavenworth Streets in San Francisco.

This one includes behind the scenes. It's funny how noisy they are without the music overlay.

As I look at these balls, they each seem to be bouncing about erratically, probably having no idea where they are going or where they will end up or what obstacles they will run into.

I feel like that often. One of my often said phrases to say is "I feel like I'm in a pinball machine."

Hey, how cool! Of course, there's a video of a pinball machine on Youtube too!

Am I showing my age when I say I remember playing pinball machines just like this one?

The difference in the two videos, though, is that the ball in the pinball machine is all alone, but the bouncing balls are amongst many. I often feel like I am all alone, bouncing about this world, never getting anywhere or accomplishing anything. 

There are always half-finished tasks waiting for me to get back to them when yet another new tasks presents itself that seems more pressing.

It seems I spend my life responding to things that come at me that turn me around and make me head off in another direction.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 

As I look at the bouncy balls and the pinball, there is an aspect easily missed that is noteworthy. The balls always eventually come to a rest before they are launched on another trip.

Yesterday I became really weary. I felt so burnt out that I could do no more. I was not physically weary, but rather mentally weary. I tend to work up to 18 hours a day and it is always brain work. The only rest my brain ever gets is when I stop for a few hours in the evening to watch tv or when I take time out for the gym.

I had time to "work" on this online business last night after "work" at my daytime job, but all I could do was sit and stare at the screen. I was burnt out.

I thought about what else I could do, but even reading a book or watching tv seemed too "mental" for me. So I decided to lay my head down and try to relax as I had learned in the gym class and just pray.

I fell asleep and slept my evening away. I awoke about 10:30 and was awake until 5:30 a.m. I made myself try to sleep between 5:30 a.m. and 7:30 a.m., but it was not good sleep.

So, I am for the worse today and need some toothpicks to keep my eyes open, but since that would hurt, I'm sucking down Diet Mountain Dew and iced tea.

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28

Wow! God's given me an invitation! He invites me to come to Him when I am weary and heavy-laden. He gives me a promise! He will give me rest!

Well, I tried that last night and it only messed up my sleep schedule. Yep, I hit one of those obstacles and have been bounced in yet another direction. However, I am trusting in God's plan and direction for me. 

"Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:29-30

God has promised me rest. I'm going to cling to that promise and know that soon He will direct me to the rest that is best for me.

Until I get to my final resting place, I am going to just breath in deeply and totally enjoy these earthly rests when they come until God sends me off to work in service to Him again.

God doesn't always promise physical and mental rest, but as long as I remain in Him, He promises "rest for my soul." That is the kind of rest that I can find complete joy in, even when I am not physically or mentally resting.


Copyright Cheryl Rutledge-Brennecke
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